Yoga Whispers from Jesus

For any of you who do not know.... I <3 LoVe <3 hot yoga! I really enjoy any kind of yoga because it helps me slow down, stretch, focus myself in the present and not the zillion things I want/need to do, but especially Bikram hot yoga (I love a good sweat).

I'll just be real honest... I thought this coming week was going to SUCK.

It is my first "peak week," aka the week before your competition, and I was convinced it would be miserable.  I pictured myself to feel weak, exhausted, incredibly hungry, irritable and out of it.... but then God stepped in today and reminded me of something very important.

I am His.

I was over halfway through my hot yoga class (my second workout today after waking up at 430 this am so hungry I had to cook my breakfast before I could even think of going back to sleep) and I was shocked at how amazing I was feeling.  Then it was clear; I felt God whisper,

"Why are you so surprised Alex? Of course you feel great because I am your energy and source of strength.  I have brought you through seventeen weeks of training with enough joy, and strength and peace to last a lifetime and I will not abandon you now.  You are walking the path I have carved out for you."

I literally giggled to myself in my savasana pose because I could just picture God shaking His head and smiling down at me.  It is SO crazy to me how quick I am to forget His Truth and how Good He is... not just some of the time, but ALL the time.  

All that being said to say, this will be a great week.  I may be hungry, I may be tired, and more weak than usual, but God is with me and will never leave me or forsake me.  I am expecting great things to happen.   

Raw

Today was yet again a struggle:

I had that overwhelming feeling that I was going to break down in tears, I knew I wasn't going to be able to push the weight I have been on my typical leg day so I was dreading going to the gym, my brain  felt like it was at a constant war.  I would be not hungry, but my body is just NEEDING food and it is just a mental war not to eat all of the edamame and peanut butter in the teachers lounge.

Well, I did end up breaking down in tears over this video: A beautiful freakin' love story....

Then I just felt super selfish after watching that.  I was just so focused on my own self pity all day... So here goes my list of things I am grateful for that happened today:

• I woke up to my alarm and not my neighbors crashing upstairs
• Spent some time with Jesus and all the reading focused on Him being my strength (yet I am so quick to forget)
• My sweet students worked so well today... overall.  I gave out like 3 detentions.  I may be tired, but that doesn't mean you can run wild and shoot paper balls Jajaja
• My amaze-balls student assistants got alot of grading done and I pushed through to get ALL CAUGHT up
• This week is the end of the nine weeks and grades are due sooooo things are a bit cray
• The other awesome Spanish II teacher has plans ALL created for the days I will miss next week as I take off to my competition 
• I survived my leg workout
• Was able to pull myself together after that video and work on some new Zumba choreo for my women
• The aforementioned upstairs neighbor came down and apologized for crashing around and introduced herself.  Sweet woman.
• My sweet man came over for a bit between jobs and kept my waning self company 
• Now I am just realizing how blessed I am and hate how negative I spent quite a few hours of my day today.

Reflecting really does help keep things in perspective.  I have 9 days to buckle down and push hard and give it all I have... today.... I could have given more.  Just keepin' it honest. 

Goals for tomorrow:

Have a successful re-feed - by successful I mean hitting my macros and not taking a few extra here and there

Make parent calls for the failing students (required for end of 9 weeks documentation)

Do my sprints during 7th period

Go to the dentist

Take spin class to burn those extra cals

Hug someone random 

Write a note to someone I appreciate 

Rollercoaster

Yesterday I was riding the struggle bus.  I had a headache all day and every single rep of my leg workout felt like it was dragging out endlessly...

Today was a new day.

I woke up and had a banging egg white omelet for breakfast, lounged on the couch, put away all my laundry and planned my clothes for next week (yes, I plan my clothes a week ahead), did my sprints, got highlights, killed my back workout and posing practice all before dinner and grocery shopping for the week.  

In the midst of all that I was able to meet a sweet group of people rockin' HerbaLife t-shirts who do a workout on Saturdays.  I will definitely be checking that out! I was able to praise Jesus for a new day and the strength to push through all that needed to be done, get to know my sweet hairstylist a little better and catch up with my sweet man.

I say all of this because tomorrow we will start fresh once again.  Did you take advantage of the time you had today to build relationships with those around you? To encourage someone? To make healthy life choices? Maybe you are filled with guilt or regret over actions from today... 

...let it go and let's try again tomorrow.  

Lamentations 3:22-23 

                 Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed,

    for his compassions never fail.

                                   They are new every morning;  

  great is your faithfulness.

Late Night Sappiness

Are you living the life of your dreams?

What is it you want most in the world? What is it you so deeply desire and think will bring you fulfillment?

• To have a successful career
• To marry "the one"
• To be happy with your body
• To mend broken relationships
• To get involved in something other than the hum-drum of daily monotony?

Let me ask you this....

             ....when was the last time you stepped outside your comfort zone?

I was doing my sprints on Wednesday, exhausted from dieting and relying only on the strength God was providing and suddenly I had this burst of energy.  I realized I was chasing after my dreams and it takes extra work, being uncomfortable, and pushing past the boundaries I thought I had(physical, mental, emotional, spiritual) to achieve the extraordinary.  

Don't laugh at me.... this is the vision board I made at the beginning of the year:

It has some of my favorite IFBB pros, great quotes, encouragement to eat healthy, love others and achieve my "dream" physique.  I have been looking at it for months, but that does not change anything.  

Intention without action is worthless. 

During my cardio sessions on the stair stepper I have been listening to sermons and came across this Beth Moore message. A few things struck me hard:

God's love for me is so deep

                     His plan for my life is purposeful and perfectly timed

                                     I was placed here at this time, in this generation to serve the purpose He has set out for me

I know, beyond the shadow of a doubt, that my job at HHS, training for this competition, teaching this Zumba class and the relationships I have been blessed with are ALL perfectly timed in God's plan and though at times I may be uncomfortable... I am so incredibly at peace walking daily with Him.  

Could you possibly believe God has a crazy, exciting plan for your life? Better than anything you ever hoped for?

The glows and grows...

Or that is what my superintendent calls them.

Grows first: 
        (This would be the ranting section)
-My upstairs neighbors were crashing around at 4:50 this a.m.... I wrote a nice note to deliver tomorrow.

 -I promise a positive will come after but seriously, you are doing reverse wrist curls in one of the two squat racks and you suggest I use the smith machine for my squats?!?!?!!? Go fly a freakin' kite with your abnormally strong forearms.

  That gave me some fantastic fuel for my leg workout. 

Now to focus on the glows:

          In this process it is REALLY easy to focus on the negatives: How much more fat I can lose, how much more I could tone my muscles, how little food I am eating right now, how easy it is to become irritable, basically enter the "woe is me" mindset, but I refuse to do that.  

Combat negativity with gratitude. 

Starting from 5:45 this am:

-I email my awesome coach, Ryan, Tuesdays and Saturdays with a weigh in and progress pics and I was down two pounds this a.m.  If you want a plan contact him! Coach Ryan

Find a diet plan that works and STICK WITH IT. I'll create a whole post about why I love IIFYM(if it fits your macros) later. 

-I had some awesome Jesus time with my green tea/lemon and made my rockin' casein café shake to take to school.  (I am going through the Bible in a year!)

-My students were amazeballs today. 

         Seriously, even my Spanish I was rockin' 

                     There were multiple moments today where I could see a student's mind reeling for an answer and then they figured it out and spoke Spanish to the class :-) Such a proud teacher and I usually make a face like this yelling YES!!!:

Seriously, God knew what I was getting myself into this year and blessed me with an amazing group of kids! 

-Finally make it to Kinetix, which has become my second home.  I <3 <3 <3 the afternoon crew of weightlifters there (yes, even the tool who didn't give up the squat rack).  Everyone is so encouraging and friendly... I ended up doing squats in the room  upstairs with no mirror and loved it!!! I felt myself hit a great depth today.  If you don't squat... you can't understand. Sorry. 

This helped me with my squat form a toonnnnn

-My Zumba women rocked my socks per usual.  They are so sweet and I am really trying to make initiative to build relationships with them.  

-I ate my last little meal of tilapia, broccoli and cottage cheese (it's good I promise) and now I am about passed out on the couch all nice and relaxed :-)

Stay positive <3 

How I Got Here.

Jesus. Sleep. Eat. Train. Teach. Repeat.

These are my priorities... pretty much in that order.  

              The past 15 weeks I have been on the journey of a lifetime - transforming my mind and body - challenging myself in ways I would have never thought possible.

Backstory: After leading Young Life in Central VA for 6 years, teaching high school Spanish for 2 years and becoming increasingly involved in the fitness realm, I felt a change stirring in my soul.  I knew my time as a Young Life leader was coming to an end and after winning a boot camp challenge at my gym, I was looking for a more challenging physical goal as well.  I decided to spend my summer in Lynchburg, away from the partying beach life of Wilmington, so I could focus on what God was doing in my soul.  

I spent every morning in the Word, fasted once a week and spent many friday evenings at worship services seeking after God's presence and surrendering this next part of my life to him. 

You cannot expect to hear from God if you do not spend time with Him. He does not want to keep His presence and His plans a secret from you, but YOU have to choose to make time to be with your Creator and the Lover of your soul. 

I had been praying about moving out of Lynchburg after this year, either to Nashville or Philly with my best girlfriends from Wilmington. I had told God after college that I would not stay in the burg after three years unless He brought a man into my life to keep me here... 

Ha.

It became increasingly clear that Lynchburg was where God wants me to stay, and even though I was man-less, I still felt completely at peace with this decision.

The thing is... when you are walking in the life Christ has mapped out for you, there is no greater peace found in the world... even if it was not what you had originally planned, it is most often way better :-) 

So why all the working out and eating healthy already!?!

I decided I have always wanted to do a figure competition and chase my "dream body" goals, so why not now? I prayed if it was something God wanted me to be involved in he would provide the means and open the doors... and boy has He! This is not a cheap hobby, but never once have I wondered if I would have enough money to buy healthy foods, pay my bills, pay my coach etc.  So my physical goals were set, but spiritually I still needed to be involved somewhere.  

I decided to start serving in the Welcome Center at my church, which has been great, but my true ministry is with the Zumba class that God just handed over to me.  I was looking for part time work and one of the instructors at my gym was moving and asked if I wanted to take over her class in Rustburg.  It works out perfectly and is a great source of extra money.  These women who come to class have really become my focus and who I want to build relationships and show Christ's love to.  <3 

Now that we are up-to-date: This blog is going to be for me to survive the next 17 days till my first figure competition.  I will journal the good, the bad and the ugly? No, none of that.  

Here are my before pictures from July....

Here are my current: excuse my face - it was 5:45 this a.m. 

Here we goooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!